I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize