Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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