we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I would fuck him just for his dog
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