ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
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