So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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