I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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