you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
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