Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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