i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
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Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
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All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
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