If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
