there was a trapeze. enough said
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
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