Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
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