yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
