Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
