this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Randomize
