u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
