Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
