She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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