As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize