i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
