Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
