they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
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From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
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i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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