I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
