I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
