Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
He passed out mid-signature
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?