I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's