First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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