Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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