doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I touched a dick in church today
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize