You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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