the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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