Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
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