her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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