She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
