We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
