Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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