i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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