Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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