he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
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Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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