I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
