You work out of a Hotel?
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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