Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize