does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
She made me pour olive oil on her.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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