you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
