Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I supernannyed him into submission
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
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