where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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