Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
