Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
