Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
