whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
