It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
We were destined to go to rehab together
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize