nut hugger
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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